Communication Skills
Rights & Responsibilities
You have the right:
- To be treated with respect.
- To have and express your own opinions.
- To ask for what you need and want in order to be effective.
- To set reasonable limits.
You have the responsibility:
- To treat others with respect.
- To listen to others.
- To acknowledge and address the needs of others.
- To respect the limits and boundaries of others.
Listening & Speaking
Listening takes …
- Concentration and energy
- Curiosity and open-mindedness
- Analysis and understanding
Speaking requires …
- Sharp focus
- Logical thinking
- Clear phrasing
- Crisp delivery
Effective Listening
Behaviors that support effective listening:
- Maintaining relaxed body posture
- Leaning slightly forward if sitting
- Facing person squarely at eye level
- Maintaining open posture
- Maintaining appropriate distance
- Offering simple acknowledgements
- Reflective meaning (paraphrase)
- Reflecting emotions
- Don’t fake listen
- Using eye contact
- Providing non-distracting environment
Behaviors that hinder effective listening:
- Acting distracted
- Telling your own story without acknowledging others first
- No response
- Invalidating response, put downs
- Interrupting
- Criticizing
- Judging
- Diagnosing
- Giving advice/solutions
- Changing the subject
- Reassuring without acknowledgment
* Adapted from the United Behavioral Health Information Web site
Positive Communication Skills
Communication takes time. Make it a priority.
- Plan an appropriate time to communicate
- Involve all the appropriate people
- Understand influences on communication:
- Personality type
- Energy level
- Past discussions
- Knowledge of the topic
Communication includes talking AND listening.
- Establish rules for "talking" time
- Learn to reflect, summarize and clarify statements
- Practice active listening, repeating what is said to insure you have interpreted it correctly
- Use "I" messages in expressing your feeling about things.
Communication is verbal, non-verbal, and para-verbal.
- Non-verbal includes gestures, postures, interpersonal space, facial expressions, and eye contact
- Para-verbal includes rate of speech, amount of speech, tone of voice
What is Communication?
Communication involves the sharing of information between people. This can be done either verbally or non-verbally, individually (i.e. on a one-to-one basis) or in a group situation. The communication may contain the following elements:
- Facts – "I got a pay raise today."
- Opinion – "I believe a deserve a pay raise."
- Feelings – "I love my boss for giving my a pay raise."
You are so used to communication with others that you forget how complication it can be. To communicate effectively you need to be clear about what you want to communication, and convey your message so that it can be understood. The other person must hear the message accurately and understand what you mean. With ineffective communication, misunderstandings can occur that can easily lead to hurt, anger, confusion, and the inability to meet your goals.
When you communicate, you also give a great deal of information without using words (i.e. by your body posture, your tone of voice, and the expression on your face--non-verbal communications). These features often give more information than verbal communication.
- Back to 4-H Youth-Adult Partnership
